Team, 46

Reminders of What You’re Missing Make the Loss More Acute

Ao3 Link

Cal looked to the south, wishing he could see the Citadel, but it was still a day off at least. He wanted to be there now, not in a day. He’d been patient, he’d been patient for weeks since he’d lost them. And now he was done being patient, and he wanted them back.

But there was nothing to be done. He didn’t have the power to speed up time, and he also didn’t have any wine, which was annoying, so he was just sitting here, staring at the southern horizon while the sun went down behind the mountains, painting everything an orange that was steadily fading behind lengthening shadows.

“You can’t see it,” Sully said, beside him. “Even if we were close enough, it’s enchanted to be hidden from the ground.”

Cal nodded. “Mathilda knew it was there.”

“I guess we didn’t think to hide it from the air. Was kind of stupid.”

“You should tell them that when we get there.”

“I’ll make sure to mention it. Course,” Sully added, smiling to himself. “They might well go and mention that I could have thought of that when I was helping enchant it.”

“You know,” Cal reflected, sighing, “you could have spent less time back in the day making my life hard now.”

“Yeah, I always wanted to take up needlepoint, but instead I wasted a lot of energy on fucking with you,” Sully admitted. “I just knew how much of a pain in the ass you’d be someday, I guess.”

Cal looked at Sully. “I’m reconsidering sleeping with you.”

“No, you’re not.”

Cal shook his head. “No, not really. When we get them back.”

“Yeah.” Sully smiled. “Assuming they’re into it.”

“They are,” Cal promised, looking up as Joey came over, walking a bit funny. He sat down beside them, red in the face. He’d been hot all day. “Are you okay?”

Joey nodded, breathing heavily. “I’m…I’m fine,” he managed. “I’m just…hot.”

“If you have a fever, we should get you checked out,” Cal said. “You’ve gotten up and wandered off like five times in the last half hour. Something wrong with your guts?”

Joey shook his head. “No, that’s not it. I’ll be fine.”

“Joey, if you’re sick…”

“I’m horny,” Joey interrupted. “That’s all. I just…I’m really hard and I can’t make it stop.”

Cal looked at him a second, then rolled his eyes. “Okay,” he said. At least it wasn’t anything serious. “You’ll have Travis back in a few days. Can you hold out until then?” It was a joke, mostly.

But Joey shook his head, face contorted in genuine upset. “No,” he said quietly. “I…Travis helped me with his last time. I can’t…”

“Can’t what?”

“My…my rut is starting again,” Joey muttered, squeezing his eyes shut. “I thought it was only supposed to happen once a year. But it’s happening again, and Travis isn’t here to…”

“Your what?” Cal asked, looking at him.

“Dragons mate on a cycle,” Sully told him, reaching out and putting a hand on Joey’s forehead. “Males rut usually once a year in the spring. If he’s entering that part of his cycle now…”

“There’s…nobody here for him to mate with, Sully,” Cal said, a little worried now. Joey sounded upset, almost in pain. And Sully seemed worried.

“Yeah. He’s not going to die or anything, but it’s going to be rough for him, and it could take forever to finish.”

“Three days,” Joey muttered, curling his knees up to his chest. “It took three days last time.”

“We can’t wait three days,” Cal protested.

Sully nodded, putting his hands on Joey’s shoulders. “I can help you.”

Joey shook his head. “No. I’m not…”

“Joey,” Cal said. “You can’t go anywhere if you have to stop to jerk off every five minutes. And we can’t wait three days. Let Sully help you.” He understood, he did. He wouldn’t want to have someone not his boyfriends help him with this either. But there were extenuating circumstances.


“Look,” Sully said, tilting Joey’s head up to look at him. “I’m not going to let you do anything that Travis would get mad about. But you need help.”

“I g-get rough…”

“And you can’t hurt me. Come on. Please?”

Joey sighed, a tear falling, and he stood, letting Sully help him. The tent in his pants was extremely evident in the firelight. “Please help.”

Sully nodded, taking Joey’s hand. “He’ll be okay in the morning,” he promised Cal, putting an arm around Joey.

“Okay,” Cal said, deciding not to ask. Maybe tomorrow he’d ask what had happened, instead of doing it now. “Take the tent.”


“Can sleep outside,” Cal said, waving them off. “The tent is more comfortable than some cave, and Joey could use a little comfort. Go.”

Sully looked at him for a moment, the nodded. “Okay. This is not quite the sexual situation I’d hoped for in that tent.”

“Consider it practice,” Cal said, turning them towards the tent. He patted Sully’s shoulder. “It’ll be okay. Sully will help.”

Joey nodded, tail wrapping around Sully’s ankle. “Take care of him,” Cal said to Sully.

Sully nodded, and the two of them went into the tent, leaving him alone and really wishing he had wine. Really cheap, bubbly wine. Why was the world so cruel as to not let him have that?

Maybe Beatrice had some, she liked to drink. Even if she hadn’t been lately. Which probably meant she had some booze that Lillian wasn’t letting her drink. Which meant Cal could drink it.

So he went over to her tent, which he knew to be empty, because she and Lillian had gone for a walk. But sadly, as soon as he reached for the flap, he heard footsteps behind him. “Hey. That’s not your tent,” Beatrice said.

Cal sighed. “I noticed.” He turned around, saw her and Lillian, arms around each other. “I was going to steal your alcohol.”

“Don’t have any,” Beatrice told him. “Got rid of it all.”

“Why the fuck would you do that?” She sucked at being a drunk. Not that Cal was surprised.

“So she didn’t drown herself in it,” Lillian said, stroking Beatrice’s arm. “It’s better that way.”

Cal rolled his eyes. “Well, that’s stupid. You could have given it to me.”

“Well, I didn’t. Go ask the knights, they might have some.”

“They’re not allowed to drink on duty,” Cal muttered, annoyed. “Oh, wait. That means they aren’t using theirs.”

“Yes. Now will you get the hell out of the way so we can go in there and have sex?” Beatrice demanded.

“Bea,” Lillian said, smacking her arm. “Don’t tell him that.”

“It’s not like he doesn’t know. He’s a horny little shit; he would have assumed anyway.”

Cal rolled his eyes again and moved aside. “You can do better,” he told Lillian.

They ignored him and went inside the tent. Cal sighed, pretending it wasn’t bothering him that everyone on his team was having sex—or whatever Joey and Sully were doing—except him, and headed over for the small cluster of tents the knights had set up nearby the prince’s tent.

From which were coming some pretty loud sounds. Cal wasn’t surprised. It seemed like Gavin and Owen only stopped having sex because they couldn’t do it while walking. And he’d thought his libido was high.

There was nobody guarding their tent, which was a bit odd, but Cal went past that and to the knights’ tents, joining them at their fire without asking. “Aren’t there usually more of you?” he asked.

The three of them looked at him. Sir Quentin was tall and a bit older, distinguished looking. His squire Parry was Cal’s age, he was pretty and dark haired, and holding a cup of something, which Cal wanted. And Sir Erik was blonde and lanky, like Wes if his limbs were too long for his body and his chest too narrow.

“Sir David and Sir Elaine have the night off,” Sir Erik told Cal, nodding vaguely at one of the tents, from which…sounds were emerging.

“And their squires are off patrolling,” Sir Quentin added, graciously passing Cal a tin cup and pouring some wine into it.

“Yeah, I’m sure that’s what they’re doing,” Parry said, rolling his eyes. “Patrolling. Each other’s bodies, maybe.”

“Thank you,” Cal said, drinking half of it in one go. “I really only came over here for that. I’m glad there’s at least someone in this camp who’s not fucking right this minute. Where’s Edwin?” Cal asked Erik.

“Guarding the prince’s tent.”

“No, he’s not.”

Erik blinked. “Then I don’t know. He was with Sir Owen earlier.”

“Maybe he’s still with Sir Owen,” Parry suggested. “They do eye-fuck each other a lot.”

“They do do that,” Erik said, obviously amused, taking a drink. “As long as he’s having fun.”

Owen and Gavin didn’t seem like the threesome type to Cal, but it wasn’t like he knew them. “At least some of us here know how to have fun with our clothes on,” he said, raising his cup.

“Actually,” said Sir Quentin. “I was just thinking that Parry and I ought to retire.” He drained his cup and stood, stretching. And since everyone knew that knights and their squires had sex, Parry did the same with a sigh. Well, whatever. More wine for Cal. “Sir Erik?” Sir Quentin asked. “You could join us if you like—you’ve been so hospitable to Parry on this trip and you’re without companion for the night.”

“I am,” Erik said, smiling at Parry, who blushed. “Sure, if you both don’t mind.”

“Not at all. Would you like to join as well?” Quentin asked, which was really very nice of him.

Cal smiled though, shaking his head. “No, thanks. I’m good. I have the wine. Have fun.”

So the knights got up, said their goodnights and headed into a tent, and Cal sighed, left by himself. It wasn’t long before he heard more sounds, so he kicked dirt over their fire and stole the bottle of wine, heading back to his own.

There, he sat facing south, drinking wine from the bottle. Stupid everyone, having sex without him. Not that he wanted to have sex with anyone here—maybe he wouldn’t have minded being in there with Sully and Joey, but that was it—so much as now he just kind of wanted to be having sex generally since everyone else was.

But his boyfriends were in a demon fortress and Cal wasn’t, so no sex for him until he got them back. Stupid demons were going to pay for that. Cal drank more wine. He was hard now.

Well, it wasn’t like anyone was around to fucking see, since they were all fucking. Stupid everyone. Cal awkwardly pushed the front of his pants down, undid his loincloth. He couldn’t go to sleep like this.

Cal jerked himself off in one hand, keeping the wine bottle in the other. When he had Wes and Mick back he wouldn’t need to do this. He’d be in a tent too, sucking Wes’s dick or fucking Mick or sandwiched in between them, kissing and touching and not wearing any clothes and it would be great.

Cal came really quickly, shooting into the fire and nearly burning the tip of his dick, which nearly made him fall over. But he recovered, had some more wine, and sighed, wiping his hand on the ground. He hadn’t done that in a good long while. Too long, clearly.

He wasn’t quite satisfied, so he kept his pants down, sitting there, staring south, and drinking the wine. Soon he’d have them back. But for now, he had all night.

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