—
Cassius was straining against the Santa pants, the fat suit underneath the coat the only thing in between him and a cute little boy with a missing tooth who was telling Cassius what he wanted for Christmas.
If Cassius ran the world, the kid would definitely be getting something long and hard for Christmas, but it sure as hell wouldn’t be a baseball bat.
Fortunately for the kid’s asshole, Cassius didn’t run the world and also already had a bunch of kids to fuck, so probably all he’d get was regular presents this year. Too bad for him.
“Ho, ho, ho,” Cassius laughed, fully into the part because he had to be—he couldn’t half-ass being a mall Santa if he wanted them to invite him back next year. “We’ll see what we can do for you, young man. You stay on the nice list and do as adults tell you, okay?” He always said to say as adults told them, not as their parents told them. Every little bit helped.
“Okay, Santa,” the kid said. He hugged Cassius, and Cassius hugged him back, supporting the kid by his butt, ho, ho, ho-ing again before letting the kid down to run back to his mom with the help of Castor the helper elf. His mom was giving her address to Santa’s photographer elf. The parents could either come back in an hour to get the photos of their kids with Santa, or they could provide their contact information and avoid hanging around the mall any longer than necessary. Most took the sensible route, and also the route that let Santa’s photographer elf know their contact information and address.
Lyren smiled at Cassius as he got the camera ready for the next kid, a little girl with pigtails that Claudius was leading over now. Cassius didn’t care overly about girls, though he’d fucked a few in his time. It was good that there were a lot of those in the line, because they gave his straining boner a break. Between them and the kids too young for Cassius to care much about, he probably wouldn’t have to have this suit dry cleaned, at least not today.
He would by Christmas, for sure. Cassius always got a lot of mileage out of this suit. There was nobody kids trusted more easily than Santa Claus.
After a few more kids, a lady with two boys came forward. One of them was a toddler who babbled at Cassius for a few minutes and clearly didn’t care much beyond seeing the red suit, but once he was done an older brother took his place. The kid was black, hair in curls, shit-eating grin on his face as he hopped into Santa’s lap. “Ho, ho, ho,” Cassius said, arm around the kid’s middle to keep him in place. “And what’s your name, young man?”
The boy giggled, squirming in Cassius’s lap. Cassius held him just so that he wouldn’t sit on the boner that would get him arrested. “You already know, you’re Santa!”
Cassius tried not to roll his eyes. He liked the smartasses. He glanced up, where Castor was discreetly holding up a small whiteboard where he’d written the kid’s name after talking to the mom. “Of course I do, Iago,” Cassius chortled. “And I also know you’re eight years old.”
Cassius didn’t need the whiteboard to know that. He was a very good judge of a kid’s age.
Iago grinned, looking up at Santa. “Only for a little while longer!”
“You’re a very big boy, Iago,” Cassius told him. He was a normal-sized boy, at least the parts of him that Cassius had seen so far. “Now, have you been naughty or nice this year?”
“I don’t know,” Iago said, suddenly turning serious. “I was hoping you could tell me. I always try to be nice, but I know sometimes I do stuff that’s bad and I get in trouble. Like the other day I promised my mom I wouldn’t run with scissors, so I did cartwheels with them instead because she didn’t say I couldn’t do that, even though I kind of knew I wasn’t going to be allowed to do that. Or the time when I made Carlos come with me on an adventure to the attic but then he got stuck up there because he’s too little to climb down the stairs and also I put him in a box to protect him from the ghosts that live up there, or don’t live up there I guess, and even though I put him in the box for his own good, my moms had to come and get us and give Carlos a bath because the box had mice poop in it. Or the time when…”
This boy would literally never stop talking if Cassius didn’t interrupt him. It made Cassius want to shove something in his mouth. In a good way. “Ho, ho, ho,” he interrupted, visualising the head that Iago would be giving him in a perfect world. “It sounds like you’re a very imaginative boy, Iago,” he said, as mental Iago choked on his cock.
Iago nodded, still serious. “My babysitter says I comprehend the world in vectors. I don’t really know what that means but he’s right about everything, he said so.”
“You should listen to him,” Cassius said, juggling Iago a little on his knee and ever so accidentally lifting his shirt up to touch bare skin. He’d taken his winter coat off for this, like a good boy. Kids should always listen to babysitters, he thought. He wondered what the chances were that Iago wasn’t a virgin thanks to the babysitter. “Now, I’ll tell you a secret. You’re on the good list again this year.” As he said it, he shifted fantasies, picturing Iago bouncing on his cock, legs splayed in front of his mom.
Iago sagged, sliding a little to the side as he sighed in relief. “Oh, good. Cause I was worried I’d get coal, which is super bad for the environment. Can I tell you what I want now?”
“Of course, tell Santa what you’d like for Christmas.” In Cassius’s imagination, Iago was too fucked out to talk.
“World peace, the reversal of climate change and for racism to stop,” Iago said promptly. He sighed again, sliding a little on Cassius’s lap. “But I asked for all that last year and I didn’t get it, so if that’s too hard, I want Pokemon Sword and also for my mom to stop making me wear underwear when I don’t feel like it.”
“Ho, ho, ho,” Cassius laughed, genuine. “I’ll see what I can do, Iago.” He twitched in the suit at the idea that Iago might not be wearing underwear right now. If Iago didn’t get off his lap soon, Cassius was going to either cum in the suit or be forced to rip someone’s clothes off. “Let’s take your picture, okay? Say Christmas!”
They smiled for Lyren, who snapped the picture and went to talk to Iago’s mom. Iago slid down, then turned, leaning in to whisper something. “Santa, can I tell you a secret?”
“Of course, Iago,” Cassius said, leaning forward. “You can trust Santa with anything.”
“I accidentally felt your thing being hard in your pants. But don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone. It’s something that happens to everyone, I guess even Santa, and you shouldn’t feel bad about it.”
Cassius had to stop himself from scooping Iago up and walking to the mall bathroom with him. Hopefully Lyren got his address. “Thank you, Iago. That’s very kind of you. You have a merry Christmas, okay?”
Iago smiled. “You too, Santa!” He hugged Cassius before running back to his mom. He had such a round, tight ass.
Cassius leaned back in his chair, signaling to Claudius. “Hey, everyone,” Claudius said, stepping in front of the line. “Santa has a very important phone call from the North Pole and he needs a short break, but we promise he’ll be back in just five minutes, okay?”
The kids sounded disappointed, but as Cassius got up, smiling and waving at the kids as he moved behind the big display, Castor helped. “Why don’t we all sing an elf song until he comes back?”
Lyren, taking down Iago and his brother’s information from their mom, winked at Cassius, who headed off to the bathroom for a Christmas present of his own. Just a fast one, though.
Santa couldn’t keep the kids waiting, after all.
—
How Best to Use a Sword 