A Plan Going Perfectly Should Always Be A Hint that Something Else Is Happening
“Dear Henry,” Henry read to Sam. “Good news. You’ll be delighted to know that Lord Hans has convinced the queen of the need to pursue an aggressive agenda to reintegrate Ech’kent into the greater body of Kyaine, and is working out a plan to kill the Sorcerer King once and for all. It is my hope that soon we can be reunited. Love, Geoffrey.”
Sam listened to the letter. He’d heard enough letters from Henry’s idiot cousin to be able to parse what this one meant. “So Hans has betrayed us.”
“Sounds like,” Henry agreed.
Sam thought about that. And about what he was going to do about it. “Okay.”
“Okay?” Henry asked. He sounded confused. “You’re not mad?”
“Of course I’m mad.” Sam stood up. “Ungrateful piece of worm-shit should have known better than this after we kept him alive and made him king.”
“Yeah. I guess I just expected you to…”
“Throw a temper tantrum?” Sam asked. Maybe he would have, if he hadn’t already decided what to do about this. “This is perfect. We’re going to visit him.”
“You want to go to Hawk’s Roost?” Henry asked.
Sam was already on his way out of the room. “Yes. I told you this before. You’re not going to argue with me on this, Henry. We’re going to deal with Hans and you’re going to stand beside me to make it clear that I’m the one doing the talking.. Go get the Sea King. And Todd.”
“Yes, he’s the annoying talking fucktoy who barks like a dog. Pull him off whatever cock he’s on and bring him here.”
Henry was quiet for a second. “Okay,” he said. “I’ll meet you upstairs.”
“Don’t take forever.” That was what Sam left him with, and he went upstairs.
Since he was alone, Sam took maybe just a little more time than he might have otherwise on the stairs, just in case they weren’t stable. The castle was only mostly repaired, after all. There had been masons everywhere the last few days looking for cracks and damages. They hadn’t found much, but there were a few places that needed patching, probably because the stone that had originally been there had been destroyed by the dragons, and so there had been nothing for Sam to put back. He had taken these steps plenty of times since he’d done the repairs though, so he knew where the gaps were.
Sam hadn’t punished the two dragons for that yet. He would. He knew how he was going to do it, even. Sam had spoken to the blacksmiths and they were making what he needed right now, but he was being patient. Part of his agreement with Ramona was that she was going to bring him some of the dragons in her colony who needed the most discipline—or whom she liked the least, Sam didn’t care—and let him have them for a while until they were better behaved. Sam was looking forward to that. He’d never had a pet before. Well, except Todd, who didn’t really count. He was more like a footstool for Sam’s cock.
Maybe a bit more than that, he thought as he made his way up the stairs. Depending on how he performed today, maybe like a chair or something.
In the room that he’d started to think of as the portal room, Sam busied himself fiddling with the teleportation circle. He’d never been to Hawk’s Roost, but he knew where it was. There had been a huge surge of magic there a while ago, on the day when Scott had been wiped out from the city. Not enough to shake the Forces like James’s temper tantrum had been, but enough that there was still a trace that Sam could use to find the city.
By the time the door opened, he’d finished working on the circle. “Your servant tells me that we are to attack Hawk’s Roost,” said the Sea King.
“Yes,” Sam told him, not interested in debating this. “You can come and help or you can stay here and jerk off in your room, or whatever it is that you do. Do you jerk off?”
“I have partaken in sex on occasion, yes.”
“Hm,” Sam grunted. He went up to the Sea King, hand on his bare chest. He stuck his other hand down the front of the Sea King’s pants, felt his cock. It was a pretty good size, he thought. Not as big as Henry’s. He was nicely muscular as well. The Sea King just stood there and let Sam do it. “Maybe I’ll fuck you sometime.”
“I am not interested.”
“That doesn’t matter,” Sam informed him. “Hans is planning to have me killed. I’m going to go speak with him.”
The Sea King snorted. “Will you kill him?”
“I don’t know.” Sam hadn’t decided that part yet, but he had been thinking he wouldn’t. It being the first thought of the Sea King only solidified that. “Him I’ll probably just torture a little bit. I want you to attack the castle while I’m in there to distract his army.”
“I do not appreciate being used in this manner,” the Sea King said. “I am no attack dog.”
Oh, for fuck’s sake. “You’re the one who said you were bored. I’m giving you something to do. You’re welcome.”
“I am not a child to be entertained,” the Sea King said, haughty. Before Sam could tell him that was exactly what he was, he spoke again. “If you wish this favour, I shall extract one in return.”
Sam paused in the act of preparing to stab the Sea King with the knife he wasn’t holding. “I’m listening.”
“You are adept at creating portals. I am not. You will create one for me.”
That wasn’t such a hardship. The one to James’s shack had only taken a week. “To where?”
“The sea south of here, that I may begin rebuilding my fleet. I will remain here as per the dark creature’s request until we have killed it, but I will not be kept from the sea any longer.” The Sea King sounded as arch and ancient as ever, but Sam heard a hint of something else in his voice. Longing, maybe.
“Fine,” said Sam. “When we return from Hawk’s Roost I’ll make you a portal.”
“Very well. In that case, let us away now.”
“In a minute. We’re still waiting for…” as Sam said that, Henry’s footsteps approached the room, with a sullen shuffle behind them that Sam recognized as Todd. “It took you fucking long enough.”
“Todd was busy,” Henry said.
“With who?” Sam didn’t really care. He was just curious.
“Quint and Hutch and Sawyer—guard Sawyer, not rebel Sawyer.” Sam had been trying to learn the guards’ names, but he hadn’t realized there was a guard Sawyer. One of the two Sawyers was going to have to change their name or he’d end up killing one of them to avoid confusion. “They’d tied him to a hitching post in the stable.”
Sam chuckled, going over to the small table in the corner. “Trying to turn you into a broodmare?” he asked Todd.
“No,” Todd muttered, quiet. “They said they rode me more often than any of the horses so that was where I should be.”
That was funny. Sam tossed an amulet at Todd. “Put that on. I have a job for you.”
“That’s what I said,” Sam agreed, feeling a tug of magic when Todd put the amulet on. He handed another one to the Sea King, and one to Henry as well. When nobody put theirs on, he lowered his around his own neck, to demonstrate that it was safe. “These amulets are connected to this teleportation circle. If you take them off, you’ll be immediately teleported—along with whoever you’re touching—back into this room. Don’t fucking take them off until you’ve done your job and you’re ready to come back.”
“So we’re going to be splitting up,” Henry said. How had he figured that out so fast?
“Yes.” Sam wasn’t going to be thrown off balance. This was important. “Sea King, you’re going to the lake, or wherever you’ll have access to the most power. Attack the castle—don’t destroy it, just be distracting enough that the castle guard is paying attention to you.”
“Very well. I shall do this.” The Sea King was hard to get a read on because his only emotion was smugness. “How shall I know when to return?”
“I’ll return you when I’m finished. Todd. We’re going to speak with Lord Hans, you remember him?”
“Good. He has a nephew. Your job is to find the nephew and kidnap him. It might take more than the time we’re there—I don’t care how long it is, but you’d better come back with the nephew. If you pull it off, I’ll let you rape him when me and Henry are done, and you can kill one of those three guards from the stable. If you fuck it up and come back without the kid, you’re getting tied to that hitching post for a week.” Sam had no idea if Todd would hate that more than whatever Derek had planned for him this week if it happened, but then again, Todd had no self-awareness and never knew what he’d actually hate at any given time.
Todd swallowed. “What if I get caught?”
“Then I guess they’ll torture or execute you.” If they took off the amulet, Todd would still teleport back here. But Sam couldn’t think of any reason to remind Todd of that. “Play up your skills as a butt-boy, maybe you can convince them to keep you around for a while. Okay, let’s get going.”
He ushered them all into the circle, and powered it without warning. They teleported, and Henry gripped Sam’s sleeve for a second to stay steady. Sam let him do it while he got his bearings as well. Todd made a gagging sound. “If you throw up, you’re licking it up,” Sam told him, stepping forward. “Henry.”
“We’re…just outside the castle,” Henry said.
“Good. That’s where Hans should be. Let’s go.”
“I shall head for the water,” the Sea King informed them, voice already receding. “The attack will commence in a short time. I suggest you remain indoors.”
Sam ignored him, heading inside with Henry, the cool wind cutting off. “I’ll go find the kid,” Todd muttered, and his footsteps shuffled off.
“His name’s Darius!” Henry called after Todd. “Do you think he’ll actually manage it?” He asked as they walked. He had his hand on Sam’s back, guiding him.
Sam didn’t know what he expected from Todd. “No. Even with you giving him hints, I imagine he’ll get caught halfway there and end up being sent back to us freshly fucked.”
“Then why send him? Why are you so invested in him suddenly?”
Sam wasn’t sure of that either. “Because he’s funny. It’s funny when he tries to do things like a real person, and then funny again when he fucks them up.”
“I think it’s more than that,” Henry said. This castle was weirdly quiet.
Sam snorted. “You’re right. I’m thinking of divorcing you and giving my knife to him instead.”
“Now that would be funny. There’s someone there.”
“Finally,” Sam muttered. “Grab them. They can take us to Hans. I’m not wandering around this stupid castle for hours.”
Henry’s hand left his back, and there was a shout. “Calm down,” Henry said. “We’re not going to hurt you.”
“Who, who are you?” a female voice asked.
“Henry, Lord of House Arkhewer. I want to see the king regent. Where is he?”
“He’s…he should be in the throne room, my lord. I…”
“Take us to him,” Sam interrupted, stepping forward. “Now.”
“Perhaps I should call…”
“Perhaps you should stay quiet and I won’t gut you,” Sam told her, letting a wave of sorcery claw its way out of him, enough that she’d feel it on her skin. “You can take us to him, or I can kill you and everyone else between me and him.”
Fear and sweat mingled in the air, but the servant said, “I…this way…” and turned down the hall. They followed her.
“I was aiming for diplomacy there,” Henry said quietly to Sam as they went.
Sam didn’t care. “My way was perfectly diplomatic. Look, we haven’t killed anyone yet.”
Bells were ringing around them, and Sam heard people shouting about an attack from the lake. They passed by several guards, none of whom paid them any attention as they went where they were going. “Good thing security here sucks.”
“Same thing would probably happen at our castle if we were attacked unawares like this.”
“It had better not,” Sam growled. Though the difference was that if his security failed, whoever attacked the castle still had to deal with him at the end. Hans was just a person.
They made it to the throne room without incident. This was kind of boring. Sam pushed the doors open and strode inside, deciding to be nice and leave the stupid servant alive. “What is this?” a voice Sam recognized called as he stepped inside. He smiled.
“Hello, Lord Hans,” Sam said. “It’s good to know you haven’t forgotten about me.”
“How could I have, after you tormented me for months?” Hans demanded.
Sam snorted. “Is that what happened?”
“All of you out,” Hans announced, presumably to the guards and whoever else was in here. “The Sorcerer King and I are going to negotiate the terms of his removal from power.”
Sam didn’t say anything. He heard people file out, doors opening. And then they all shut with a series of thuds.
“There are no terms,” Sam said, before Hans could speak. “I agreed to make you king here, and you agreed to serve me. You haven’t upheld your end of the bargain. Since you cannot do that, I will replace you with someone who can.”
“It is not that simple,” Hans growled. “I cannot be seen to be grovelling to you. If I do, nobody will accept me as regent. I must show strength.”
“You must show obedience,” Sam snapped. He pulled Hans towards him, letting him fall to the floor. He stood before the king regent. “Or else you’re useless to me.”
“But with the queen returned, I…”
“You marry her, fuck her until she’s pregnant and kill her once she has the baby,”
Sam felt a pop in the back of his mind: Todd’s amulet, pulling something more than just Todd. Sam was legitimately impressed; he hadn’t thought it would be that fast. He put his foot on Hans’s head to shut him up, leaning down. “I’m leaving now, Lord Hans,” Sam told him. “And in order to ensure your cooperation, I’m taking your little nephew with me, and I’m going to rape him every day until I receive word telling me you’ve gotten the queen pregnant.”
“No! Darius is…”
“Don’t worry, I’ve gotten good at training butt-boys. Unless he’s as much a fool as you, he won’t even end up with any serious scars.”
“Goodbye, Hans,” Sam kicked him in the face for good measure, then turned on his heel and walked away, reaching for his amulet. “Let’s go.”
“Yeah,” said Henry. Sam was impressed that he’d kept quiet that whole time. He’d have to reward him. Maybe he could be Darius’s first.
Together they teleported back to the castle, appearing in the portal room. “You’d better have actually gotten the kid,” Sam said to Todd, who’d better also be here. “I don’t plan to go…”
A weight on his back, and there was a point at Sam’s throat. So fast that Sam froze. “Now,” said a young voice. “I know you can kill me if you want. But think real hard about whether you can do that before I poke you hard with this.”
Sam could. He could. But the kid sounded so sure. If this was how his relationship with Darius was going to start, then Sam had been lying to Hans about the lack of scars. “Get off of me.”
“I will, once I’m sure you’re not going to kill me. I want to talk to you, Sorcerer King,” said Darius.
“I don’t talk to people who threaten me.” What should he do? Should he kill him now? That was a waste of a hostage. If Hans found out, there’d be no reason for him to… “I promised your uncle I wouldn’t hurt you. Don’t make me a liar.”
Darius snorted. “My uncle’s dead. Your dad killed him. Good guess, though.”
“Fuck,” Henry said, moving closer. “Giacomo?”
“Hi, cousin,” the boy—Giacomo—said. “I remember you being smaller.”
“This is your cousin?” Sam demanded, trying not to draw his voice in when the point of the blade pressed into his throat.
“Yes. Giacomo DiSheere. Geoffrey’s brother.”
“I’m, I’m…” Todd’s voice wavered. “He grabbed me when I started to leave with the kid.”
“Everyone calm down,” said Giacomo DiSheere. “I’m not here to cause any trouble. I just think we have a lot in common. So what do you say?” He pressed the knife a little closer, just short of drawing blood. “Are we going to talk? Or do I have to do something…drastic?”
2 thoughts on “Villain, 64”
Oh, Giacomo… that adorable little monster! Poor Geoffrey is going to be frantic when he finds he’s slipped his leash.
To be honest, I’m impressed with Todd here. He was given very little to work with, and he isn’t exactly the most effective minion, normally. But he made a grab at the right kid! I figured he’d grab some other poor kiddo, and we’d all have a good laugh about it. Knowing Todd, probably the smallest and least dangerous one that could plausibly be a noble, say, Uri. (Not a haha-funny sort of laugh.)
Yeah, Geoffrey’s in for a hell of a shock when he realizes that Giacomo is not only not where he’s supposed to be, but that nobody actually knows where he is.
You’re right though, this was a prime opportunity for another “Oh, Todd!” pratfall moment. One that definitely wouldn’t have been funny-funny so much as “oh no” funny and ended in someone like Uri getting brutally raped. At least Giacomo probably won’t get that treatment…though Darius himself might not be so lucky.
But yeah, a big win for Todd, marred only by a small hiccup. All in all, much more than we expect from him!