Character Profile: John

Name: Johnathon of the Orange Witch Clan, Johnathon Kamaka-Schwarz (Modern AU)

Aliases/AKAs: John, Jo-Jo, Blood Reader, Thumbsucker

Title(s): N/A

Hair Colour: Black

Eye Colour: Brown

Height: 190 cm

Weight: 70 kg

Build: Gaunt

Distinguishing Marks: Numerous piercings in his ears, eyebrows, nipples, belly button, dick and balls, spiderweb tattoo on his right shoulder, fang tattoos on his buttocks, flaming eye tattoos on his chest, sun and moon tattoos on his chest, thornbush tattoos on both lower legs, cracked chalice tattoo on his left shoulder, patterned tattoos up both arms, island tattoos on his back

Dick Size: Large

Relationships (Romantic and/or Sexual): Kyle (father/lover), Sylvester (partner), Constantine Hammerhead and Alanna (zombie pirate lovers), the Sea King (temporary fling), Gus, Hui (ex-boyfriends)

Family Relationships: Lia and Cuzon (blood brothers), Jocelyn (mother), Kayla and James (siblings), Julia (aunt), Jay and Tana (cousins), Josephine (grandmother), Joel (grandfather, deceased), Tim, Delilah and Joey (uncles and aunt, deceased), Joy (cousin, deceased), Ron (brother-in-law), Denver, Louis, Sharon, The crew of the Coral Witch (crew)

Sexuality: Pansexual

Preferred Positions: Underneath partner, on the floor

Kinks: Daddy kink, ageplay kink, dominance/submission, power kink, feeding, aftercare

Orgies Attended: The Pungja Loft Orgies, The Stag Keep Orgy

Bio: The oldest son of two witches-turned-necromancers, John was raised for the first portion of his life in his mother’s forest home, learning the basics of his craft from his family’s two distinctly different styles. As he got older, he also started to learn necromancy from his parents, which they made sure he didn’t tell anyone about and he kept secret because he thought it was cool to have a secret like that. After his parents killed half his family and convinced him that he was complicit in their crimes and would be killed if he didn’t join them, John left the forest and went to live on an island called Cabbar with his parents and sister, where he has lived the last five years, excepting the half year he spent in a city called Pungja on a mysterious undiscovered continent, where he came up with a few avant-garde techniques for animating corpses that he used to revolutionize piracy on Menechit’s west coast. 


  • John is proficient in both his parents’ styles of witchcraft, as well as the style of the clan he met in Pungja, and also several branches of necromancy. While he isn’t uniquely powerful, he does possess much greater technical aptitude for magic than most people
  • When John accidentally opened himself a portal to Pungja, he very seriously considered staying there for the rest of his life. The only reason he didn’t was because his parents found him and made him come home
  • Some, but not all, of John’s piercings serve as receptacles for his necromantic power
  • John’s necromancy is far more advanced at a theoretical level than his parents’ because he was able to study it formally in Pungja, where it isn’t illegal
  • John always found the forest too quiet, but the night that he and his parents left, he swears he heard it screaming
  • John can’t decide if he thinks James is brave for defying their parents or stupid for refusing their offer
  • The only time John enjoyed his life with his family was when he was with Gus. When Gus left, John spent months wishing he could come back and get him, but knowing he didn’t deserve it
  • John wishes he had a better relationship with Kayla, but he just can’t get along with her
  • John is terrified of needles, but always manages to overcome it when he wants a new tattoo or piercing
  • John is fluent in Daolo, Kyn and Gronnde, but also Dekna, the native language of the Bevia Islands; Farthi, the language spoken in the Pungja region; and Tün, a dominant Tunga language. He also reads in Heen, a dead language from Djyekkan, but not fluently


  • “Big kids are supposed to have things their parents don’t know about.”
  • “Don’t be a baby, James. Come with us. It’s going to be awesome.”
  • “It’s going to be awful and everything, but at least you’ll die quickly.”
  • “I don’t mean anyone any harm.”
  • “Unpaid debts tend to weigh on witches.”
  • “If you’d met my mom, you’d understand. Once upon a time my brother wouldn’t do what she wanted, so she tried to kill him. Several times.”
  • “I literally made Constantine Hammerhead’s soul in my dad’s shed and attached it to a dead body I had lying around. He’s not a real person.”
  • “Look. I need your help, okay? And you need my help. Can we help each other? I promise I won’t try to kill you or anyone you like again.”
  • “I…I…Goldwage sap. Got all over me…”
  • “Yeah. I’m good. Everything’s great, daddy.”
  • “What’s wrong with wanting to enjoy myself a bit?”
  • “Magic isn’t just about power. It’s about ideas. And I have a lot of ideas.”


  • John is fascinated by spiders, snakes, insects, lizards and birds, but is afraid of dogs, big cats and most rodents
  • If John didn’t live with his parents, he would be naked all the time. He hardly wore clothes in Pungja
  • John lost his virginity to Gus when he was fifteen. His dad caught them, but left before they noticed 
  • John got himself circumcised after a month in Pungja so people would stop making fun of him
  • John nearly always craves a large yellow fruit that grows all over Tundj but nowhere else, and regrets not taking seeds with him when he left
  • In their first week on Cabbar after leaving home, John was bit by a snake and almost died. His mother reminds him monthly that it was her antivenom that saved his life
  • John had many sexual partners in Pungja, including several friends from the local witch clan, the librarian at the library he frequented, two dragons who he let take turns fucking him for three days in exchange for access to some artifacts they had in their hoard, and his tattoo artist and boyfriend Hui, with whom he was in an open relationship until John had to leave
  • John has two blood brothers in Pungja. He considers them his family in a way he doesn’t consider his blood family
  • Parentage in Tundj is determined by marriage—a child is always the child of a married couple unless there is no married couple. For this reason, John is definitely not the father of a two-year-old boy named Zac
  • John didn’t really want his artificial souls to be pirates, but he had to do something with them that his mother would approve of so she didn’t make him stop the experiments

Modern AU: Modern John is a coroner working in the city’s biggest morgue, where he pretends that he isn’t related to a bunch of mob-affiliated criminals and just enjoys performing autopsies on people who have died gruesome deaths. He regrets going with his parents when they had that falling out with the rest of his family a few years ago, but also regrets that he pretty much cut ties with his parents when he graduated from school and barely sees them anymore. At the same time, he’s happier than he ever has been, and is planning to move down south to the area where he lived during a gap year, as the friends he made there are more important to him than anyone he knows in his hometown. When he’s not cutting up dead people or avoiding living people, John likes rock climbing, bird watching, contemplating new piercings and hooking up with ill-advised people in often unsafe environments. 

10 thoughts on “Character Profile: John

    1. She’s aware, and she’s very salty about it, and it’s why she’s so hard on him for the few mistakes he has made. 🙂 She does her best to convince him that he’s not as talented or smart as he is.



  1. Given that John is better at necromancy than either of his parents, is a more versatile witch, and has friends on a mysterious continent that few people on Menechit even know about…I suspect that sooner or later that she doesn’t actually have any power over him, or at least none she can actually enforce. Sure, there’s death threats, but two can play at that game and he’s arguably stronger.


    1. Yes, exactly. And her death threats at the moment in Renegade are largely based on her having access to Hammerhead and Alanna, which as we know by the main timeline, she no longer does. 🙂 There’s definitely an argument to be made that once she loses that leverage over him, she won’t have a leg to stand on if he wants to go his own way.



          1. Better villain, my ass. Everything she’s tried has not only failed but backfired on her horribly. Solomon has actual accomplishments to his name.


              1. Well for one, he wasn’t on the run from his own clan. Because he killed them and took all their stuff.

                He established a network of spies and contacts Sam and Henry still don’t know the full extent of.

                Even if he didn’t precisely conquer Ech’kent, it was under his control and the only people inclined to argue were dead and/or imprisoned.

                So it’s fair to say he was in a better position than he was when he started his scheme, which is generally what villains cook up their nefarious plots for.

                Jocelyn, by contrast, lost the power and prestige she already had, lost the magic stone she gambled it on to a son she so thoroughly alienated that she has basically zero chance of ever getting her hands on it again, and now is on the run and with limited assets, most of which she is in the process of losing because they happen to be people and she’s a selfish amoral control freak. She’d be in a better position if she’d never bothered with the scheming and contented herself with what she already had.


              2. Well yes, when you put it like that, she hasn’t really accomplished all that much that we know of.

                On the other hand, all of Solomon’s children betrayed him, so there’s that, haha.


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