The Best Tours Always End in the Most Important Part of the Building
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“These are the kitchens,” Frederick said, waving his hand around what was clearly a kitchen. “Obviously, I guess.”
Edwin smiled, looking around. It was about ten times the size of the kitchen at Stag Keep and about a hundred times as busy. “I mean, it could have been a laundry room.”
Frederick laughed. He had a cute laugh. He had cute most things. “Sure. This is Uncle Eliezer, he’s one of the cooks here. Eliezer, this is my friend Sir Edwin, he’s Prince Grey Rain and Prince Greg’s head bodyguard.”
Eliezer was an older guy who was losing his hair, but had a soft smile. “It’s nice to meet you, Sir Edwin. Thank you for everything you do.”
Edwin shook his hand. “Thank you for everything you do, sir. It must be so much work cooking for the whole castle.”
“It’s an experience, but a good one,” said Eliezer. “If you ever want anything special made for you or your knights, just come let me know, okay?”
“I will,” Edwin promised. All of Gavin’s family ate so well that it was tough to imagine what something even more special would look like. “Can I tell you, though, the princes don’t like carrots?”
“They don’t?”
Edwin shook his head. “Neither of them does. Greg knows they’re healthy so he pretends he likes them even though he doesn’t, and Grey Rain puts his onto Owen’s plate.”
“Huh,” said Eliezer. “I’ll make sure the other cooks know that. Thank you, Sir Edwin.”
Edwin nodded. “I like carrots, though. I should go, I think Frederick has more stuff to show me.”
“I’m sure he does,” Eliezer chuckled. “You two have a good day.”
“We are, and we’re going to be having a great night too,” Frederick promised, taking Edwin’s hand and leading him away. “See you, Eliezer!”
“See you, boys.”
“Uncle Eliezer’s great,” Frederick said. “He’s a really nice guy. That’s my friend Kenny over there cleaning that pot. If you ever need anything and the kitchen is really busy, just tell him I sent you and he’ll take care of you.”
“Even if you didn’t send me?”
Frederick shrugged. “Especially if I didn’t send you. What else are friends for?”
“Good point,” Edwin said, as Frederick led him on a tour of the servant’s quarters.
“So,” Frederick said, as they went through there. “It must have been really crazy living in the fortress with all the knights, huh?”
“It didn’t seem crazy after a while,” Edwin told him, looking around at all the people here. “Way less crazy than living here.”
“I guess.” Frederick walked closer to Edwin to let someone get around them with some baskets, then stayed closer to Edwin as they walked. “But it must be dangerous? I heard you had a jailbreak a while ago.”
Edwin shrugged. “That wasn’t as scary as it sounds. And anyway, Rudy’s innocent.”
“Really?” Frederick asked. “Is that why Gavin’s protecting him?”
“Yes. How’d you know about that?”
“Servants gossip sometimes,” Frederick said with a shrug. “Our baths are over here. I guess I shouldn’t say ‘our’ since I don’t really use them much anymore. I won’t make you walk through all these hallways here but there’s the secret servant hallways that let us get around the castle without being in everyone’s way.”
Edwin peered down one of them. “Can we go down those? I think it would be good if I knew where they were and where they led.” It was basically a perfect place for a killer to hide.
Frederick was smiling. “Definitely,” he said, squeezing Edwin’s hand. “But could I show them to you later on? After we’ve seen the library?”
“What’s in the library?”
Frederick shrugged. “Nothing. It’s just cool.”
Sure it was. Frederick did seem like the kind of guy who’d be into reading—he was a wizard, apparently—but Edwin had a feeling that wasn’t why he was excited about the library, which he’d mentioned four or five times already. “Sure, then. Let’s go to the library.”
“Awesome,” Frederick said, looping his arm through Edwin’s. Edwin smiled and flexed it.
“So, what’s it like being a wizard?”
“It’s a lot of math,” Frederick said, frowning a little. “Like, a lot of math. But it’s cool. I know how to light candles without matches and make wind blow, and I can almost boil water, which is especially useful if the pot it’s in doesn’t also melt. Oh, I can also do this.” He took a breath, concentrated, and held out his hand for a second.
The laces on Edwin’s pants came untied. Frederick looked very proud of himself. Edwin chuckled. “Suddenly I’m interested in becoming a wizard.”
“You don’t need to become one,” said Frederick, moving his finger again. Edwin’s belt buckle opened too. “I can be one for both of us, Sir Edwin.”
“That sounds fun. How much can you do with that spell?”
Frederick shrugged. “I haven’t really had the chance to practice it much.”
“You need a test dummy?” Owen was still upstairs, so Edwin supposed this burden would have to fall to him.
Beaming now, Frederick quickened his step. “That would be awesome. This is the library. Anyone’s allowed to use it, and we have a lot of books on different stuff, but mostly history. Oh, you remember my boyfriend Silas, right? Hi, Silas.”
“Hey,” said a skinny boy with dark hair and ink stains on his sleeves. All he needed were some eyeglasses and he’d be recognizable as a scribe anywhere in the world. “How’s the tour going?”
“Good. Sir Edwin’s having some trouble keeping his clothes on, but good. I was planning to show him our bedroom next.”
Well, that was a lot more forward than Frederick had been so far, which was really saying something. Silas was nodding as he capped his inkwell.
Frederick turned to Edwin. “Silas is my boyfriend, and he and I have rules,” he told Edwin, matter of fact suddenly. “Everyone who wants to have sex with me has to ask his permission first.”
Oh. Okay. “Him? Not you?”
Frederick shook his head. “Him. He’s the boss and I trust him to make good decisions for me.”
“Got it,” Edwin said. He turned to Silas, then knelt down so that Silas, on his chair, was taller than him. “Silas. Your boyfriend is really cute and I like him a lot. Could I have sex with him, please?”
Silas looked down at Edwin, affecting an imperious look. He crossed his legs. “Are you going to be nice to him and treat him properly?”
“Absolutely,” Edwin promised. “I’ll treat him like a prince.”
“Are you going to make him feel good?”
“The best.”
“And are you going to tell him he’s pretty?”
“Silas…” Frederick whinged.
Edwin smiled. “Of course I am. What reason would I have to lie?”
“None at all. Okay. Then yes, you can have sex with him.”
“Great.” Edwin got up, took Frederick’s hand again. “Where’s your bedroom?”
“This way,” Frederick muttered, but he didn’t move. “Thank you,” he said to Silas.
Silas pulled him down into a kiss, then patted his cheek. “Have fun.”
Frederick nodded and pulled Edwin out of the library, down a hallway, around a corner. “So we’re done the tour?” Edwin asked.
“Nope,” Frederick said, pointing. “My bedroom is this way, and the king works in that long room over there.”
Edwin had never been to the throne room, but he did recognize its doors from having dropped Greg off at them once. “Okay. Perfect, I feel like I know everything I need.” Nobody else really mattered, he figured.
“You don’t know me nearly well enough yet, but we’ll fix that,” Frederick said. A minute later he pulled Franz up to a guarded door. “Hi, Mateo. Is the prince in?”
“Nope,” said Mateo the guard, who was a southerner and probably one of Prince Franz’s bodyguards.
“Great,” Frederick said, opening the door and leading Edwin into some nice apartments that were just a shade less nice than Gavin’s. They were empty but for a giant dog that hopped down from a couch as soon as they came inside. “Hi, Dragon,” Frederick said. “This is Edwin.”
Dragon came over and sniffed Edwin for a second, looking up at him. Edwin gave him a pat on the head. “You’re a good boy, right?”
Dragon gave Edwin a lick, then went back to the couch to go to sleep again.
“He likes you,” Frederick declared proudly, and he marched Edwin to a small bedroom near the back, shutting the door with a determined nod. “Okay. Stand still so I can take off your clothes.”
“Okay,” said Edwin, standing very still. “Is it just me or were you being way more subtle before?”
“I was,” said Frederick. “But that was taking such a long time and you’re quite simply too hot for that, Sir Edwin.” He held his hands, tongue sticking between his lips cutely.
Edwin’s armour unbuckled itself and fell to the floor, then his shirt started to unlace. His pants and belt had been undone the whole time he’d been in the library, oops.
That made things easier though, because once his shirt was unlaced, Frederick took a breath and Edwin’s pants fell down. His boots were coming unlaced too. “You’re, uh, going to need to lift your feet for me,” Frederick said, red in the face.
“Sure,” Edwin said, lifting his left one first. With a tug, nothing happened. Then with a bigger tug, it came off, and his pantleg as well. Edwin put his foot down, and lifted his other one for Frederick to repeat the process.
Frederick was breathing pretty hard now, face getting adorably ruddy with exertion, but Edwin’s shirt started to lift up, and Edwin raised his arms to help Frederick along with that. Slowly it lifted over his head, needing a good tug to get past his neck, then another one to get off his arms. It fell to the floor, leaving Edwin in just his smallclothes. “Good work.”
“Not done yet,” Frederick said, and his magic started tugging at Edwin’s smallclothes. He looked exhausted, but Edwin let him do it. It was clear that this was important to him. It took a minute, but soon his smallclothes came down, his boner popping free as they slid down his legs. He lifted up one foot and then the other, and then he was naked.
Frederick smiled a triumphant smile and sat down on the bed. “Hah. I knew I could do it.”
“Awesome,” said Edwin, coming over to sit next to him on the bed. “You going to do yours now too?”
Frederick shook his head. “No, you can do mine.”
“Got it,” said Edwin. He slowly undid all of Frederick’s laces, pulling his boots off one at a time. Then he unlaced Frederick’s shirt, pulled it over his head, then his undershirt. With those on the floor, he kissed Frederick’s chest, finding it smooth and soft. He had a little bit of muscle definition, but it was clear he didn’t do a lot of physical labour.
It was really cute. Edwin kissed him again, hand brushing over the boner in his pants. “You don’t have smallclothes on,” he accused.
Frederick giggled. “I told you the tour took longer than I expected it to, Sir Edwin.”
“Where’d you stash them?” Edwin asked, kissing his belly, just above the line of his pants.
Frederick shrugged. “In the library.”
“Of course.” Edwin unlaced his pants, slowly.
“You’re taking a really long time, Sir Edwin.”
“Yeah,” Edwin agreed. “Because you’re really cute and I like watching you squirm a little.”
“That’s mean. You promised Silas you’d be nice to me.”
Edwin kissed his dick through his pants. “I think I’m being nice.”
“I think if you were being nice I’d be naked by now.”
Edwin chuckled, sliding one hand under Frederick. “Your turn to stay stiff.”
“Not a problem…hey!” Edwin had picked Frederick up by the small of his back so he could pull his pants down and then off. Like a good boy, Frederick kept his whole body perfectly flat, with one rock hard exception.
“Is that better?” He asked, lowering his precious cargo down.
“Much better,” Frederick whispered, laying back now, Edwin between his legs. Edwin moved up, kissing all the way until he got to Frederick’s mouth, where he gave a gentle one to his lips. “Much better.”
“Much better,” Edwin agreed, claiming Frederick’s mouth in another kiss. Frederick wrapped his arms around Edwin’s neck, and Edwin pressed up against him while they kissed each other, holding each other and not doing much more than that.
Well, they did a little more than that. After a while, Frederick started to squirm again underneath him, his dick pressed against Edwin’s. He rubbed himself against Edwin, and Edwin rubbed back. They started grinding against each other, and Frederick started making noises into Edwin’s mouth.
Edwin wasn’t as close as Frederick was, but he kept going, kept grinding against Frederick, his smooth, soft body that fit perfectly under Edwin’s. Frederick gasped in the breath he’d stolen from Edwin as he came, squirting between them. He lay there panting, while Edwin kissed his neck and shoulders to help him through it.
Then he slid his hand down, wrapped it around Edwin’s dick, and started kissing him again as he stroked Edwin. Edwin let him do that, holding Frederick, and soon came all up Frederick’s belly.
Frederick smiled at him, giving Edwin one more kiss. Edwin smiled back. “So if I want to do that again, do I have to ask Silas again?”
Frederick nodded. “Unless you want to do it again right now, that’s fine. But if you want to do it again tomorrow, you have to ask again.”
“Okay.” Edwin kissed him. “I want to do it again right now.”
“Me too. But can we wait twenty minutes? Magic is exhausting actually and I kind of tired myself out undressing you.”
“Sure,” Edwin said, moving so he was on his side, spooning Frederick. “We can wait as long as you want.”
Frederick faced him, arm on Edwin’s shoulder. “Would you ask Silas again right now if you had to?”
“Frederick, I’d get on my knees and beg.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“But you deserve it.”
Frederick went red, looking pleased with that. “Thank you.”
Now Edwin kissed his forehead. “Thank you for the tour.”
“The tour was actually just an excuse to get you in my bed,” Frederick admitted.
“Well, I’ll tell you a secret. Next time you want me in your bed, just ask. No excuses needed. Either me or my brother, whoever’s closer.”
“I’ll keep that in mind, Sir Edwin.”
Edwin chuckled and held Frederick there, letting him get some well deserved rest. They were both going to need it to get through the rest of the afternoon, because Edwin didn’t plan to leave until he had to.
He had nowhere he’d rather be right now.
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How Best to Use a Sword 