Name: Helena of House Quate, Helena Quate (Modern AU)
Aliases/AKAs: The Landscaper, Librarian
Title(s): Minister for Dolovin Domestic Affairs/Dolovin Spymaster
Hair Colour: Black
Eye Colour: Blue
Height: 166 cm
Weight: 63 kg
Distinguishing Marks: Star-shaped birthmark on her left breast
Vagina Size: Average
Relationships (Romantic and/or Sexual): Paul of House Quate (husband)
Family Relationships: Hector of House Quate (son), Boey of House DiGorre (son’s partner), Holden and Jenna of House Quate (parents, deceased), Jolene of House Blackspire, Henry of House Quate, Harper of House Murkwain (siblings), Bartimaeus of House Blackspire, Gregor of House Quate, Anders of House Murkwain (brothers-in-law), Boris, Jane and Ben of House Blackspire, Gail and Gilbert of House Quate (nephews and nieces) Julian and Easton of House Draughten (brother and brother-in-law, deceased), Emmanuel of House Draughten (nephew, deceased)
Preferred Positions: Seated
Kinks: Role play, spankings
Orgies Attended: The Foothill Equinox Orgy
Bio: The leader of Dolovai’s noble House Quate, Helena was the second-oldest of her siblings and therefore not destined from birth to be the leader. Her older sister’s marriage into House Blackspire changed the succession status somewhat, and Helena became the leader of the family when her father died. Now Dolovai’s domestic minister and spymaster, she tends to leave the running of her lands to her husband Paul and her brother Henry so she can busy herself with raising her only son Hector, and of course with running Dolovai—and a few other entities—from the shadows. Recently, Helena’s job has gotten more challenging as others try to do the same, and she’s run across a particularly pernicious enemy that even her widespread spy network can’t root out. But she is dedicated to protecting the Dolovin crown and country, and she won’t be stymied by any enemy, no matter how mysterious and powerful.
- Helena wanted to be Dolovai’s spymaster when she was very young, and pursuant to that, spent most of her childhood and adolescence cultivating a network of spies and informants which now encompasses the entirety of Menechit and a growing part of the rest of the world
- Helena’s marriage was arranged by her parents, who surprised everyone, including Helena, by betrothing her to a minor vassal of House Hardhold for reasons they shared with nobody
- Helena was pregnant three other times before she had Hector. She had an abortion the first time because she knew Paul wasn’t the father, but the other two pregnancies ended in miscarriage, and she and Paul weren’t successful in having any children after Hector
- Helena and the rest of House Quate are closely related to the Yellow Witch Clan, and though Helena is not herself a witch, she has studied the Yellow Clan’s metallurgical research extensively
- Helena’s goal was always to make the world a better place. After Hector was born, the goal shifted to making the world a safer place
- Helena loves her husband deeply, but also knows they fight if they’re together too long, and that it’s better if they stay apart
- Helena briefly courted Gerard ven Sancte as a teenager, and many thought they’d marry before he became engaged to Georgina Arkberry
- Though she reports all information that she finds relevant to Gerard so he can be as informed as possible, Helena sometimes finds it necessary to make judgement calls about what she considers relevant
- Helena had been in the final stages of arranging a marriage between Hector and a Yellow Clan member named Jonas, which she called off when it became clear that Hector was serious about Boey, annoying the Yellow Clan
- In order to best keep her finger on everything happening in Dolovai, Helena secretly participates in several groups, including the leadership of the Empty Moon Assassins’ Guild, as well as many other guilds that are less deadly, and is a member via secret proxy of the naval and military structures of both Dolovai and Kyaine, as well as both nations’ merchants’ associations
- “I hear you’ve become friends with Kenneth’s boy.”
- “A secret passage or two is always a good idea in a house, don’t you agree?”
- “Takes an assassination attempt to get you to talk to me.”
- “You need to do something while the king and queen eat with your parents’ murderer, don’t you?”
- “You’re managing your spy’s love life?”
- “I do aim for transparency in all things, my prince.”
- “I can hardly betray the king’s confidence.”
- “We don’t always tell our spouses everything.”
- “There’s always a greener pasture, my prince.”
- “Did I not just explain that the fate of our civilization may hang in the balance?”
- “You’re very lucky that Samson Arkhewer doesn’t have the resources I do.”
- “I apologize. My son was having a crisis.”
- “As I keep telling you, if you want me to be on time, you must stop setting these meetings in the middle of the day. Can we not meet in the dark of night like respectable assassins?”
- Helena occasionally acquires magical artefacts. The dangerous ones she generally gives to her friend Mathilda. The harmless ones that only magical people can use, she gives to the academy. The ones that non-magical people can use, she keeps for herself
- Helena trained as a gymnast for most of her adolescence and is still quite skilled
- Helena lost her virginity to Grace ven Sancte when she was thirteen and they were both drunk at a party. The next day, they had a threesome with Gerard
- Helena keeps a poison pill on her person at all times, just in case
- Several goblin clans live on Helena’s lands; most of them have agreements with House Quate, but some of them don’t, and Helena has never understood the ones that choose to continue being antagonistic and inevitably end up getting killed for it
- When Helena and Paul met after being betrothed, they snuck away from their parents to have sex in a closet to determine if they were really compatible
- Helena’s greatest personal annoyance is that Gerard and Georgina won’t budge on their negotiations with the bards’ guild, which she thinks they should do
- Helena knows that Paul has been having an affair with their accountant for several years. She tries not to let this bother her and also tries to tell herself that her own occasional affairs aren’t inspired by jealousy
- Helena once bought a sex toy that, when she used it, turned out to be cursed and was stuck inside her for two days. She eventually found a cursebreaker who could remove it, but chose to keep the curse on the toy intact
- Helena is the anonymous author of the popular pornographic series Giselle’s Journeys, about a woman who keeps ending up in increasingly improbable scenarios where she must satisfy the sexual desires of various groups of people. The most popular of these, Giselle’s Centaur Journey, is in its seventh edition
Modern AU: Modern Helena is an investigative journalist who covers a variety of local issues from the criminal underworld to the schemes of the rich and political. She is known throughout the city and the nation for her incisive work that can undo any cover-up and get past any smokescreen. She is the host of the popular news programme Unveiled as well as the successful podcast The Naked Now, where she goes into intimate detail about the work public figures, without ever being salacious or gossipy. When she isn’t on the air or investigating something in way more detail than anyone wants her to, Helena likes to attend progressive rock concerts, redecorate her house and collect vintage sex toys.
4 thoughts on “Character Profile: Helena”
For someone leaning so hard into being a hidden puppetmaster and evil mastermind, Klaus seems to make exactly the wrong enemies.
Helena is a case in point. A supremely competent, efficient, and well-connected spymaster with fingers in almost every pie Klaus does whose highest ambition is leaving the world better than she found it for future generations, and he goes and antagonizes her instead of recruiting her. If his plans really are for the greater good, convincing her to help ought to be a cinch: just be honest and direct about what he’s trying to do and why. Except that’s the one thing Klaus will never do. And also he may be deluding himself about the “greater good”. So now as soon as Helena gets in contact with Cameron, Isaac, or anyone else who can fill her in on the few pieces she has yet to put together, Klaus is screwed.
Yeah, I think Helena’s chapter makes the flaws in Klaus’s strategies very clear. She could be such an ally to Klaus, except that he’s such a narcissist that he’ll never recruit her because she’s smarter than him and he can’t adequately control her. And you’re right, he may well be deluding himself about the so-called greater good his plans are in service of. His greater good is ultimately what’s good for him, and of course Helena isn’t interested in that, so he’d never consider having her as an ally.
Klaus is really good at making enemies, for such a supposed genius evil mastermind, you’re not wrong.
Is it just me, or is Helena’s opsec leagues better than Klaus’s? We’ve been seeing signs of Klaus’s involvement in everything for ages now, while we never had so much as a hint of how far Helena’s web stretched until that chapter from her perspective. And all without the benefit of thousands of years’ worth of head start, or secret magics no one else knows about, or anything. Just non-magical tradecraft and a few minor magical artifacts.
Yeah, especially considering he’s immortal and has the ability to be literally anywhere at any time, it’s kind of mind-blowing that Helena manages to be so much better than Klaus at most of what he does. Nobody in-universe realizes the extent of her network, and until this chapter came out, a lot of people who were reading the story thought she wasn’t a very good spymaster, because she’s just that good at hiding what she does.
I think the main difference between her and Klaus is that Klaus, in addition to his actual goals, wants people to realize how smart he is, and all of his plans contain a dramatic reveal at some point because he wants to impress people. If Helena were Klaus nobody would have ever seen her and she’s have accomplished all the same things but more quietly, because she doesn’t care about receiving credit for what she does as long as it gets done.