Masterposts

Here you can find the masterposts for all the stories in the series, if you’d like to read through one story individually. If you click on the relevant story link you’ll get taken to the individual masterpost for the story in question. I’ve also provided a brief summary of each story for new readers! Enjoy reading!

Dragons Don’t Give A Shit about Your Outdated Gender Stereotypes is the story of Owen, who wanted to rescue a princess from a dragon, met Prince Gavin instead, and now the two of them are on the world’s greatest adventure as they fight ghouls, trolls, evil wizards, demons and of course an endless supply of dragons, all while keeping time for each other at the end of the day.

It’s Not as Easy as Just Wandering into a Forest and Killing the Witch is the story of Ron, who in the course of running away from his problems decided to kill a dangerous woods witch, got stuck in a plant and accidentally on purpose agreed to become the James the witch’s property for a year. And, well, it turns out that’s not nearly as bad as it sounds, even if he’s not allowed to wear clothes or swear.

Being a Team that Shares A Tent Means Certain Rules Must Be Observed is the story of Cal and his teammates Wes and Mick, wandering artefact hunters who start dating each other in addition to working together, and then get caught up in some events of  potentially apocalyptic proportions when mysterious beings from the dawn of time start to recognize Cal.

If the Chosen One Can’t Defy Heteronormative Stereotypes, Who Can? is the story of Isaac, the world’s most reluctant chosen one who really thinks that if the prophecy picked him, it must be a stupid prophecy. He’d much rather spend his time getting to know all the cute boys in his life than living out some stupid quest story, but unfortunately for him he’s going to have to find time to do both.

If Stowing Away Is the Best Idea You’ve Got, You Need Better Ideas is the story of Pax, who has very good ideas, thank you very much. It just so happens that he didn’t have much time to plan out which ship he was going to stow away on and ended up on one going the wrong way, but given how distractingly attractive the first mate Nate is, he can’t really complain that much. And in trying to find a ride, he may have found himself a family instead.

The Noble Traditions of Knighthood Are Absolute, Regardless of Personal Relationships is the story of Edwin as he squires for his brother Erik in his quest to become the best knight in the order of…no, wait, Edwin doesn’t care about that, he just wanted to be with Erik. Nevermind that the world seems to have other plans and keeps saddling Edwin with more and more responsibilities in spite of himself.

You Don’t Have to Be Sadistic to Be the Villain, but it Helps is the story of Sam, son of the evil Sorcerer King, and Henry, the king’s would-be assassin who failed in his quest and is now at Sam’s dubious mercy. It doesn’t take long for their relationship to get even more complicated than that as they both have to learn to navigate their new world of violence, schemes and power and protect themselves from their greatest threat: each other.

Whoever Said Every Cloud Has A Silver Lining Obviously Never Endured Slavery is the story of Daniel, newly-bought slave to rich investor Theodore, a man with a known predilection for young boys. But Theodore isn’t always the villain he seems and Daniel is no ordinary slave either, and it doesn’t seem to matter that they’re better off without each other, neither of them can seem to let go, or give up.

Princes Marry Princesses; That Doesn’t Mean They Don’t Love Their Best Friends Instead is the story of Prince Franz, who has moved to the northern kingdom to marry their princess, Gabrielle, and has waded into a vipers’ nest of schemes and plots, many of which are directed right at him and his bride-to-be. Good thing he’s brought his companion Boey and his dog Dragon with him, because with them at his side, he’s sure he’ll be fine.

Belonging to A Noble House Means Putting Loyalty to Your Family above All Else is the story of Geoffrey and Giacomo DiSheere and their attempts to exert influence over Kyaine and protect their house and, most importantly, each other from all that would threaten it.

Not All Dragons Kidnap Princes, Some Just Want to Make Friends is the story of Travis, who went looking for the dragon who kidnapped the princess in the hopes of befriending it, met a different dragon instead, and was perfectly happy with that, because Joey the dragon was just as happy to have a friend as he was.

Life Is Rarely Easy When You’re Companion to A Queen is the story of Cordelia, companion to Queen Francesca DiGorre of Kyaine, as she navigates court politics and threats to the throne from without and within, all with her wife Isabella at her side.

Usurping the Throne Is Easy; Keeping it Is the Hard Part is the story of King Stephan Fyrhawk the First of Kyaine, having usurped the throne from his queen. He’s going to learn that being king isn’t as easy as it looked from afar, and that the people who helped him usurp one throne might not be against usurping another one if he’s not careful with who he trusts.

Is There Anyone More Ambitious Than the Servant Who Seeks to Rise in Station? is the story of Drew, servant to Prince Gavin, who isn’t content to be content with his station in life and, in the small town of Techen’s Stand where he was left behind, finds that he can be a whole lot more than he is, as long as he’s willing to do what it takes.

It Is Not Unusual for the Wizard’s Apprentice to Be Burdened with a Terrible Destiny is story of Ignatius and Gus, a wizard’s apprentice and his helper and boyfriend, as they’re dispatched on a quest to rescue the deposed queen’s remaining daughter from captivity under the usurper, and kill the usurper in the process, despite their reservations.

No Matter What You’ve Heard, Angels Aren’t Any Better at Solving the World’s Problems than Anyone Else is the story of Jude, an angel who’d really rather work on finding his next ex instead of worrying about the theological crisis that’s shaking the very core of his being and his order, as he navigates the second synod of angels and demons, all trying to figure out a solution to the problem of God–namely, the problem that God wants to kill them all.

Rebelling Against the Throne Means Being Willing to Do What it Takes is the story following the rebels fighting against King Sam’s rule over Ech’kent, along with their stalwart dragon ally who is happy to break dragon law about intervening in human conflicts…for a price.

Small Faeries Having Big Problems May Be a Cliche, But it’s Also True is the story of Juniper, a faery in the queen’s clan who’s trying to figure out what’s happening with the centaur village, apologize to his ex for cheating on him, and deal with a very annoying narrator who seems to enjoy tormenting him.

The Life of A Renegade Is Hard, But Not for the Reasons You’ve Been Led to Believe is the story of John, James’s older brother who, after being accidentally doused with the sap of a plant with unfortunate sexual properties, finds that only his dad can make him feel all better.

Princes and Paupers Have Different Problems and Switching Places Only Solves Some of Them is the story of Niall and Russ, a prince and a commoner who decide to switch places for the week, only Niall forgets to tell Russ that sometimes people try to kill princes, and Russ forgets to tell Niall and commoners have to work for a living.

Soothsaying Is Just Common Sense, but Knowing the Future Isn’t So Easy is the story of Mads and Nuka, con artists in the city of Narwhal Junction who get wrapped up in something bigger than them when Mads’s act as someone who can see the future accidentally comes true and he ends up realizing that actually knowing things other people don’t also means doing something about it.

Not Every Small Town Villager Can Be a Hero, No Matter What Stories Say is the story of Odin, part-time bartender and cousin to Owen, as he navigates the fraught life of a small town boy who has a major, embarrassing crush on the hot new kid, made slightly worse by the bandit who’ve decided to target their rural home.

Cadets Must Always Train Hard if They Want to Earn the Best Positions is the story of Augustus and Nathan, the newest recruits in the time-protecting Temporal Bureau, as they try to get through their training, learning everything they can about the Bureau and its mission (and which time rules are more bendable than others) along the way. As they train, they’ll learn more about themselves, figure out how to be partners and learn how this interpersonal relationship stuff works, and hopefully solve a few time crimes.

Everyone Is the Main Character of Their Own Story; It’s Just that Some Get More Attention than Others is an anthology of chapters from the points of view of various side characters in the story who I want to showcase but can’t or don’t want to give a whole full-length story to. These will fit into the main plot, but are generally going to feature characters going about their ordinary lives while everyone else saves the world or whatever it is that main characters do.

The Histories of the World Are Written One Soul at A Time are stories that are set in the past of the main continuity. Some of them are far, far in the past and feature events that shaped the world of How Best to Use a Sword as it is today, and some of them are in the much more recent past and show the backstories of characters in the main story. All are self-contained stories that don’t continue after what’s already up.

We Modern Men Don’t Fight with Swords is the series’s Modern AU, which is a just for fun reimagining of characters and setting in the modern period! There’s no serious plot here and it’s largely request-based. I try to update this when I don’t have normal chapters to post.

I don’t have a masterpost for them, but I also take prompts and requests for the series, put in a collection called The Moments in Between the Moment Are Just as Important, which are a fun way to show the characters in settings that they don’t normally exist in, or interacting with people outside their own narratives, or in fun AUs for a few thousand words. Some of them are canon and some of them are not, and I’m always open to requests, so fell free to send one to me if you have one!